2 years back, I was most probably the most bad temper person you could ever meet in your life. I get angry easily and just cursed back whatever that could made me feel better without taking into account other people's feelings. I admit I was a jerk back then.
But now, I'm kind of proud of myself that I can take jokes and whatever critics easy, as long as it does not cross my limit. However, people tend to take this for granted that they feel their jokes particularly something very personal are really funny and they can go on and on the whole day and even make fun of me publicly in front of people whom I do not know and I still have to let it go with a big smile on my face. Inside my head I was like keep telling myself to keep COOL and chill.
My question is how many time can you actually chill over a certain matter particularly those related to your family or body or your hair or just your physical look/appearance? Fuck there is a limit right? There are friends whom whenever they see me, we do not have a topic and in order to not having awkward moments, he/she starts making fun of my hair or eyes (because I have super small eyes equally as a thin line) or my shirts or my dress. All I can do is to keep on grinning like an idiot and he/she continues with his jokes and dude, sometime I rather you just shut your mouth and talk no shits.
One particular remark that I always get would be:
"wah wan sin your eyes so sibeh small."
"I know.. thanks. look like korean right?"
"hahahaha so don't want face. so damn small. small eyes yerrr no eyes one."
"No eyes one hahahaha eh you see her eyes so small so funny no eyes one!!!"
".. :) with poker face"
"hahahaha how you see things de eh open bigger show me your eyes where are your eyes?"
":) ahahaha (in my head i would have kill you 10 times)"
Like THE FUCK? And this conversation repeats itself until we bid goodbye or it repeats again the next time we meet. For one or two times, I can really accept but if it happens repetitively over times, I get fed up, tired of this kind of jokes and eventually feel that he/she has no respect towards me or even my parents at all. This pair of eyes are given by my parents, by God. What right you have to comment over it.
In life all we need is constructive comment but not critics that will bring one's self-esteem down and down. If that is the way of you to communicate with your friends, clearly this type of communication for me is wrong and disrespectful. What your point of bringing someone down? To make yourself look or sound greater?
I'm not finger-pointing at anyone. Just want to have a chance to vent out my opinions. I might be wrong but this is what I think at least. I just hope that the next time you or whoever meet me, stop making fun of my eyes unless you are my bf or from my family.
Because obviously I'm bored and fed up of it.